i love this record baby, but i can't see straight anymore

i left new york on the best possible note. i didn't even know i could leave new york on such a good note. if there's a better note, i don't want to be on it.

strange, i had written the last post, about the friends i had made, before pulling it together and still slightly overwhelmed with all the packing i had left, headed downtown to maggie and paul's to start off a "one final hurrah" night. i had been out every night that week, i was drinking way more than usual, and underneath it all was this minor anxiety about just making sure everything was sorted out before i left. but i knew it was important that we all have one final night together.

well. i show up around 10:30, paul answers the door terribly excited to see me, and i think it's just because i can hear the men at work song "down under" playing in the living room, so i assume it's just a little joke and i'm all caught up in that, that i'm totally thrown off when i come into the living room and everyone yells, "surprise!"

"what the fuck!" i cried, because i could hardly believe none of this was a joke, it was in fact a surprise going away party that maggie had been planning for weeks. ashley and joey are there, and a number of maggie's friends i had met only a handful of times but were just as excited as anyone else to send me off with a fond farewell. unfortunately, kristen and jay were both out of town, but just the fact that maggie was plotting this with jay and people from work and trying to arrange a perfect time that everyone could make it--and i, of course, was totally oblivious--was entirely endearing. and despite a few missing faces, it took nothing away, and the timing could not have been better.

so we had a fantastic night. the highlight, of course, being that maggie and paul--taking a cue from this little blog of mine--decided to make, from scratch, wedges with sour cream and sweet chili sauce. i mean, they bought the potatoes and all the spices and followed a recipe from some australian website, scrubbing and slicing and baking and pretty much doing everything but what anyone in australia would do, which is just buy a bag of the frozen wedges and throw them in the oven for twenty minutes.

it's silly how touching something so basic as homemade wedges can be. appropriately enough, i got very drunk and ate almost all of them. they were really good.

i also have to note, throughout friday, between the last day at work and the night out, how many incredibly kind and moving sentiments were made. i think back to that first few weeks that i lived in new york, how awfully lonely they were, how insignificant i felt in this city, and now a little over a year later, the huge 180 my life has done. i count no greater success in new york than being told, "you've truly touched all of us." i don't really think there's a better definition of making it somewhere--of "making it in new york"--than actually being capable of connecting with other people and making a difference in their lives.

friday night was probably my favorite night out in new york of the past year. even if some things didn't go according to plan, as far as i was concerned, it was exactly how it should have gone. i feel like i left everyone remembering them just the way i wanted to, and knowing without a doubt that i have something to come back to.

now i'm in new jersey for a few days, with a small to-do list left of things that need to be done. and then i fly out friday. already, when i look back on new york, i see it as something encased, a period of my life that is over for now, but preserved.

and that leaves me with no option but moving forward. i'm entirely ready.

i can't wait to tell australia about these potato wedges.